Category: self-help

Broken, Depression, hope, Inspiration, mental health, motivational, reflection, Self Empowerment, self-help, Spiritual Awareness, Testimony, Wisdom

A New Normal

It’s been a long time since I’ve felt deeply faint at heart. To be truthfully honest, I’ve been heavy in spirit during this time of quarantine. It’s my REALBOLDTRUTH.

But Chanel, you’re so strong, such an encourager, a survivor of so much, and one others look to for inspiration.

I’m sorry to disappoint those who have uttered those words about me, but this time I’ve been shook.

Prior to the “Shut In” I was on a fast for 15 days. I needed to seek God’s face for a very specific challenge in my life. I needed to make sure I wasn’t making permanent decisions based off of temporary and fleeting feelings. I needed to hear confirmation from My Savior.

Well, He gave it to me and confirmed that He releases me to let go of the thing that ails my heart the most. “You’ve done all you can, what remains is in my hands.” Said the Spirit of the Lord.

Upon those words, I broke my fast knowing with great confidence that my next steps would be approved by Him. Then the Pandemic hit putting constraints around every aspect of my life which would not allow me to move.

Instantly, I felt stuck, smothered, constrained, disappointed and without options. Honestly, I began to question what I believe I heard while denying my flesh of food and drink. Did He truly speak to me? If He did, He’s beyond silent right now! I could surly use some specific assurance in this one area of my life that grieves me tremendously.

Although weak in faith, I remember His word that it’s during these times that He is my strength. A very present help in times of trouble.

Move fluidly in this “Temporary” New Normal by way of His Spirit. These are the words I’ve encouraged myself to do. There really is no other choice that will produce a victorious outcome.

He spoke to me indeed but this cross I must carry for a little while longer as my God prepares my ultimate outcome.

I trust Him. I love Him, I want to be used by Him and most importantly, I need Him!

Things will never truly go back to the way they use to be. For the state this world is in has never seen a time like this.

For every believing heart that has been wrestling with the things you see, feel and experience, draw closer to the one that has this all in His hands. This “New Normal” indeed is working for our good. Just wait and see:-)

Inspiration, motivational, Motivational Moments, reflection, Self Empowerment, self-help, Spiritual Awareness, Testimony, Win, Wisdom

P.R.E.S.S. Into 2019

Another year is quickly fading away. In less than 48 hours, for those blessed to experience the transition, we will be embracing the New with the power and diligence to forsake the old.

For me personally, 2018 has been excessively bittersweet. A great deal of pain, disappointments and unexpected events occurred this year. Yet all accompanied by great opportunities for spiritual growth. I watched God be a healer, provider and reconciler. I often take a moment to reflect on what was in order to prepare for what shall be.

As I share my heart on this final post for the year, I hear in my spirit to make this phrase a purpose filled priority.

P.R.E.S.S.

As a foundational acronym:

Praise & Pray:

Inspite of the experience in hurt, uncertainty, grief, need, lack of direction, illness, rejection and delays.

Rest:

In the arms of your Heavenly Father spiritually and mentally. Allow Him to touch those tender areas that no man can. Don’t forsake your body of the ease it requires to sustain this next chapter of your life. You’re going to need it!

Exercise & Eat Healthy:

Take care of your temple by committing to a consistent regime that promotes prolong life and stamina. This is not optional in order to bring what God has ordained to be reveal to and through you!

Settle:

In your mind that the past is the past! It happened but doesn’t define your future hope by any means necessary! Use these experiences as growth tools knowing that God is STILL for you!

Walk into 2019 with gratitude no matter what your reality looks like naturally. God’s blessed you with more time, another day and another season. It ain’t over yet and the best is still yet to come!

Inspiration, motivational, Motivational Moments, reflection, Self Empowerment, self-help, Spiritual Awareness

Knowing Your Worth

Being a survivor of more than two decades of chronic depression, I vividly recall struggling with knowing my worth.

During those extremely dark years, my self esteem was low; more like non-existent! I had such a warped perception of myself and didn’t see value in who I was as a person, woman and even a Child of God. During my stent with daily depressive mood swings, I professed to be a Christian the entire time but was not experiencing the victory over my mind which was rightfully mine!

As a result, many around me failed to value me as well. Why should they? If I didn’t value myself there was no way I could demand that anyone else do the same. I allowed myself to be taken advantage of, disrespected, overlooked, passed by and so much more. I wasted so many priceless years looking to be validated by those who never deserved me in the first place.

Fast forward to today, my stance and how I view myself is the healthiest it’s ever been! I know who I am and who I belong to! My Heavenly Father is a King so that makes me a princess! I expected to be treated as such!

In my marriage

By my friends

By my children

In my Career/On my job

In my community

Now don’t get me wrong, I am not looking for people to bow down to me like the Queen of England. That’s not what I mean by any definition!

It just means that I demand to be respected, heard, valued and treated as a rational human being. That’s what knowing your “Worth” will do! It will give you the power and strength to stop others from harming you with their words, deeds and actions.

We are all worthy of this in every facet of our lives and should never allow another to treat us any less than the precious Children of God that we are!

Nuff said; That is all!

Photo/Set Backdrop Designed by Kay Lynn of Diamond In The Ruff Event Planning

Broken, motivational, reflection, self-help

The Redeemer for your Residue

You are completely covered with a thin layer of grime that seems impossible to wash away. Its equivalent to a tough and stubborn hard-water stain with major calcium build-up! It’s sight is as familiar as those glasses in the dish washer that came out looking nearly as they did going in.

It’s slimy

Sticky

Smudging

Blinding

And down right icky 

It’s clean, you convince yourself since it went through the quick rinse cycle so you dry it off, put it on the self, close the cupboard and praise God that it’s at least concealed. Just like those dingy dishes, so is the residue of your past . It just won’t seem to wash away, so you suppress and hide it.

That abuse

That rejection

That divorce

That relationship gone astray

That abortion

That melestation 

That loss

That misfortune 

That affair

That decision you made

That disease that refuses to heal serving as a periodic reminder of who you once were and USE to be…..

So you Advance through the years with your routine surface rinse calling it clean when you know, downright it’s still filthy and riddled with dirt. Don’t you see the cloudy film that remains even after your thorough scrub of prayer, praise and even heart felt worship? It’s still there! You fool many for you appear well put together, in apparel, education, maturity, filled with the Holy Ghost, speaking in tongues, encouraging others and shouting around the church.
You’ve gotten use to the residue. At least it’s not as visible as it use to be. Maybe it won’t ever be 100% clear so the faint excess of its existence is going to have to be good enough.

But your Redeemer who is Christ Jesus, laid his life down just for these messy matters. His precious blood is the only cleansing agent powerful enough to wash that film away once and for all! It was never yours to keep when you gave your life to the Redeemer. What filth remains are just mere facts that occurred in your life and are not meant to define your future or for you to clean up on your own. It’s the enemy who purposely tries to remind you of those lies that your dirt is a permanent stain on your destiny.

Take that mess out of the cabinet and put it back in the washer one more again! This time, put it through the full wash cycle and add in a double dose of antibacterial faith, warfare prayer, confessions, counseling and the matchless word of God!! That residue has no defense against this mental and spiritual dust busting concoction! Enough is enough; it has to go!

Are you a Christian but secretly STILL struggle with the events of your past? 
It’s time to pull it up from the root and REALLY experience freedom! Gods got so much for you but can’t make it come to pass until you are truly set free from those demonic ties that bind.

Christ Jesus is your Savior, your Healer and your Redeemer!

reflection, self-help

Soulful Sunday – This New Creature

The woman I am today hasn’t been around all that long. I’m not use to her but I want to get to know her better because I like her an awful lot!

You see, I’ve known the old me longer than the new. The old is familiar and comfortable. I have over 30 years of history with her and I know what to expect. But she’s dark, oppressed, depressed, lacks a healthy self image and confidence. This new demeanor is bold, aggressive, feels she can do anything she puts her mind too, will tackle matters even if she feels scared and refuses to give up! She’s only been around for a very short time. Where has this chick been all my life!!!

As a believer in Christ Jesus, I wish I could say that the transformation from the old to the new was some instantaneous metamorphosis! Well, it hasn’t been! The truth is, I fight almost daily to walk in 2nd Corinthians 5:17. 

The good news is that every day the old me is being pushed out of the spotlight, while the new me takes center stage, exudes all of her fabulousness and is completely taking over!! I am intimidated by her for I don’t know what she’s truly capable of! I also admire and look up to her. She has to stay for I trust the God who has called her forth.

This may sound like an oxymoron to many who know the new me but I still struggle to feel on the inside what I look like on the outside. It’s a tug of war daily but a fight the new me is destined to win! Those accustomed to the old watch, wonder, whisper and stare. That’s ok, because the new me can handle all of that!

She has plans in spite of her past. She has strength that the old me couldn’t begin to fathom. She’s holding on to her faith in assurance that Job 8:7 will be a sure part of her destiny. Soon and very soon the old me will rest in peace, while the new will continue to operate in humility in remembrance of what she evolved from. It’s all in the Name of Christ Jesus.

Are you in transformation? Can you relate to this inner battle I have shared with you? It’s real but a journey I am so privileged to be on! The world hasn’t begun to see what the new me has to offer. For the first time in my life, I’m excited about the possibilities.

Happy Sunday!

The New Me

Inspiration, motherhood, reflection, self-help

Motherhood: A Sacrificial Choice

motherhood


“Motherhood is an instinct, YES, But it is also a practice; It CAN be learned.” Alice Walker
I think Motherhood is the hardest job in the world now that I am one!  It is a selfless act that requires one to deny, derail, and temporarily delay your own wants, desires and sometimes even your needs for the well-being of another….

Many women embrace and stay dedicated to this awesome challenge when their maternal instincts kick in.  Life is now about that child who becomes a priority over self.  We are now commissioned and predestined to mold and shape the very existence of another human being.  To think about it in these terms, it is an overwhelming, often times scary and delicate process.  Most figure it out and make the necessary adjustments so that their children can thrive. Others don’t fair so well leaving countless lives forever shattered.

Motherhood can be a heavy burden that can drive a mother to do unfathomable things.  The demands are never-ending and some women simply don’t survive the process.  Consider Andrea Yates who simply woke up one morning after her husband went to work and decided to drown her 5 children in 2001.  Or more recent acts of a Philadelphia mother, Nyia Parler who abandoned her disabled 21-year-old quadriplegic son with cerebral palsy in a park with nothing more than a blanket and a bible.  Nothing but the grace of God that he was found and survived the elements of rain and 30 degree temperatures.  Lastly a 19-year-old mother, Johnesha Perry threw her 1-year-old baby boy over a bridge into shallow waters in Lehigh County PA just last week.  She ultimately jumped in after him.  These stories are harsh realities and proof that there is a very thin line between sanity and insanity as a Mother. I don’t judge the actions of these women by far.  My heart goes out to everyone involved.  I can only imagine the types of pressures these women were under when they decided to take such drastic measures.

Although I have never felt so desperate as to bring harm to my son, but I do admit that I have looked at him over the years and wondered if I am going to be able to survive the process.  These thoughts entered my mind when I felt the most alone the most unsupported and the most overcome. When the mind is unstable and the spirit is crushed the job of motherhood becomes extremely complicated. An ever-present help is needed. (Psalms 46:1)

Regardless of how difficult motherhood can be at times, it is still a privileged honor all in the same breath. The mother first has to make the choice to want to perfect the art, not be selfish, and seek ways to learn how to survive the process if she just doesn’t know how….. The word of God says that “Children are a blessing and a gift from the Lord.” (Psalm 127:3) The one and only true way to survive the loads of motherhood is to stay rooted in God.

I did not always view motherhood as the gift that it is.  I was appointed to be the mother of three.  But due to my own fears, doubts, and self-centered ways, I took it upon myself to return two souls back to the Heavenly Father who gave them to me.  I rejected the gifts with excuses, earthy rationale and with much pity.  Certainly my burden to bear but I thank God for being forever forgiven….. (Thank you Jesus!)

The one I saw through to full term I am committed to beyond description.  My son is 4 years old as I pen these words and brings me unspeakable joy.  At the same time challenges every fiber of my being.  Spiritually I am convicted to be the best mother I can be to him and raise him to be a Godly man.  My physical challenges are great as I push through complications of Multiple Sclerosis with smiles, laughter, hugs and love.  For he does not understand nor does he need to know; at least not right now.  Mentally, as I continue to battle through insecurities, bouts of depression and the results of my own childhood, I constantly question if I am doing the right thing by him.  It is the greatest challenge of my life, but I am so up for it! What other purpose shall my life serve if not to take responsibility to be the best Mother I can be?  He deserves nothing less…. I am also blessed to have some wonderful step children who I love unconditionally as if I birthed them myself.

The role of being a mother never ends.  The definition just shifts as children grow older.  I sternly believe that the job of a mother only ends when her life is over.  It is a long-term sacrifice for those who have stepped up and stayed committed to the calling.

The pain of an absent mother also never ends.  It is a bond that the human spirit requires and if absent and abused will forever scar the soul.  No amount of praying or growing up will take the hurt away caused by a mother who simply decided not to be.  Consider some famous, strong and independent figures that appear well put together and are clearly successful but when asked about their relationships with their mothers, they will crumble and the wounded child within quickly emerges:

  • Kirk Franklin – Famous Gospel Singer
  • Patti Stanger – Host of Millionaire Matchmaker
  • Hugh Jackman – Actor
  • Courtney Love – Actress
  • Gary Coleman (Deceased)– Child Actor
  • Kenya Moore – Reality TV Star
  • Drew Barrymore – Actress

I have watched interviews of each of the above named figures concerning their relationships with their biological mothers.  The agony, is real, it is deep and permanent.  Feelings are mostly suppressed and managed in sometimes self-destructive ways, but it never dulls and never ever goes away…..

I salute every real mother who sacrifices, endures and embraces the hardest job in the world without quitting.  You are to be acknowledged for your greatest sacrifice while:

  • Working full-time and going to school.
  • Suffering from medical conditions (Mentally & Physically)
  • The father of your children walking out on you, becoming disloyal and mentally abusing you as your body went through the necessary changes to bring forth life.
  • Searching how to become a mother for your children when you were never mothered yourself.
  • Remembering that provision does not take the place of being present.

Or a combination of these things….

My mission as a mother is to assure that my son never looks me in the eye and say you weren’t there, you didn’t try, you didn’t teach or warn me, you didn’t provide, you didn’t give me a decent start, you didn’t love me, you failed me…
He could very well grow up and give me his back side but it won’t be the result of me not putting forth my very best effort in preparation for his life.  I will never stop sacrificing for him for it is my call, my duty, my forever blessing. 
Furthermore, concerning this assigned task over my life, I want my Heavenly father to tell me, “Well done, my good and faithful servant…” (Matthew 25:21)

Motherhood is a choice, not a title.  Just as we chose to put ourselves in position to conceive, we must choose to do the right thing by the lives we bought to this earth; regardless of how hard it is. That means constant long-term sacrifices through behavioral problems, disabilities, and other challenges children may bring to further complicate our lives.  If we fail in this area we don’t have the right to expect our children to willingly want to look out for our well-being when they themselves become adults.   (That’s REAL TALK!)
They didn’t’ ask to be here and again, they are our gifts from the Lord most High.
To all the women worthy of the title, Happy Mother’s Day; You deserve it and so much more……
“Motherhood is not about what you gave up to have a child, but what you gained by having one.” Author Unknown


Self Empowerment, self-help, Spiritual Awareness

Would You Turn That Mess Off!!

  
Recently I stumbled across the Blog of a woman who is battling chronic depression. The way she so eloquently expressed the mounting issues she faces daily, reflected my own life easily. It all sounded eerie and so familiar of how I once thought regularly. She claims she is defeated, and without options. My heart and soul connected with her instantly. She has my empathy, sympathy and more. I absolutely commend her for writing about it, for I know this is therapeutic in surviving this mental health issue. She’s a brave soul, But she needs to know she has control if she wants it…..
  
For me, Depression is like watching a 24 hour marathon of the old TV series M.A.S.H! Some of you may remember it well. Back in the 70’s and 80’s this once popular television program flooded many American living rooms at least weekly. I apologize in advance if you were a fan. I just didn’t get it or I probably never gave it a chance. I was so young back then and never found any appreciation for the series by far! As soon as I would hear the theme music, I would cringe, get up and turn the channel immediately!  To me the music sounded depressing! The show may have been good but I couldn’t get past that darn theme song!!!! 

  

When I started experiencing depression very early in my life I could relate to my fellow blogger. I listened to what ever channel was playing in my mind all day. It wasn’t what I wanted to hear at all, yet I entertained whatever was playing as if I had no options! I won’t, I can’t, I’ll never, no one loves you, you don’t deserve, your father doesn’t care, your mother isn’t there, you will always be poor, you are socially odd and will never have friends, you’re not smart, you are ugly, you are a failure, Yadda, Yadda, Yadda…..TALK ABOUT DEPRESSION!!! All those thoughts were some real M.A.S.H.
  
The above was the M.A.S.H. in my life for 20+ years!!!!  As a result I’ve purposely put myself in danger and have felt suicidal multiple times throughout my youth, young adult years and part of my adult life. All because my mind was stuck on the wrong station!

  

One day I got up mentally, picked up an old rusty pair of pliers, (for those who understand that knob on old model boob tubes!) and changed the re-running channel playing repetitively in my pretty little head! 

  

Those pliers were the Word of God that spoke the complete opposite of what naturally played the moment I woke up! Glory to God, I have a new program I’m completely addicted too!! Don’t get me wrong, clear reception did not happen overnight. I had to put much pressure on the tool to get the knob to actually turn! That station was stubborn! Sometimes I used both hands until I got the first click! 

  

That old M.A.S.H. re-run would always try to come back on, but by applying much purposed resistance through the Word of God, that Stinkin Station finally went off the air!!!!

  

Do you have some M.A.S.H. In you life that has gripped you from experiencing who you REALLY are as defined by God? (1 John 4:4, Galatians 3:26, 1 Peter 2:9-10, 1 Corinthians 3:16, 1 Thessalonians 5:5, These are just a few! Look them up!) You have the power to shut off those negative voices in your head by getting in your rightful position. (2nd Corinthians 5:21 calls you the righteousness of God!) 

  
  

It takes work daily in order to get more positive reception, but the efforts are worth it! At least you don’t have to get up anymore. The pliers have retired! Now we have remote controls and accessing the Word through social media, the Internet and other forms have made these efforts a lot more plentiful and easily accessible! 

   

Kick the enemy out of the DVR in your mind, re-program your mental TV guide and walk into God’s best for your life! You and your destiny are so well worth it!
 

 

Now for those who I’ve offended, here is my peace offering; that M.A.S.H. theme song! Enjoy, if you can! Geesshhh! 😜

Inspiration, Live, motivational, reflection, Self Empowerment, self-help, Spiritual Awareness, Win

Rear View Mirrors

  

 
I’m a bit annoyed today! PO’ed, disgusted and down right angry. Not at anyone or anything in particular; just the foolishness and stupidity of the spiritual adversary.

  
His tricks and lies have so many bound up that they fail to see that life has so much more to offer. Will you join me and stop wasting so much time entertaining his agenda? He’s doing his job consistently. When will we begin to do ours with that same level of tenacity and more? 

  
I know a mature woman who has endured a great deal of trouble in her youth. For her, these days occurred well over 30 years ago. She’s a believer in the Gospel yet she’s majorly stuck in her past. I don’t talk to her much and frankly I just can’t. Whenever I do she finds a way to bring up her past as if I haven’t heard the story countless times already! She’s wasting her precious later years dwelling on yesterday. She says with her mouth that it’s her testimony but is not using the experience effectively for the good of others. Her actions clearly reflect that she never got over the pain leaving other areas in her life completely unfulfilled. Although I have a level of sympathy for her it does not run deep. She has options but chooses to think the same way, producing the same results while her time is winding down…

  

Does this story sound familiar? Is this someone you know? Is this you? If so, How long will you remain stuck, affected, paralyzed, play the victim, seeking sympathy, operating in jealousy, living in lack, non-prosperous spiritually, physically and mentally?

  

If you are a believer in the gospel of Christ Jesus, His sacrifice, His resurrection and His precious blood, I honestly believe it is an insult to all He has done for us if we CHOOSE to remain defeated! The mentality is indeed a CHOICE! It’s a mindset and no one else can be blamed certainly after a time.

  

He blesses us with a new day, everyday to take steps to walk into our destiny. He won’t affect your free will to remain hopeless but why choose that when he said that He came that we may have life and life more abundantly? (John 10:10)

  

We will always have trouble in this world. (John 16:33) We can’t get away from it! So will you remain ineffective, unproductive, heavy laden, cast down and defeated all the remaining days of your life? That’s exactly what the enemy wants! Stop allowing him to run amuck in your mind! You have the power, authority and dominion to live in abundance! (I’m not speaking of just material things.) Open your mouth, speak those things, get up and fight back! Don’t leave this earth with a gift you never shared, a ministry/business you never birthed, a testimony you never spoke and a destiny you never experienced because you allowed the enemy to win!

You can’t blame anyone else for your current circumstances especially if the offenses occurred 10,20,30 40 or even 50 years ago! 

So you were rejected 

So you were robbed 

So you were molested 

So you got fired 

So you were denied 

So you filed bankruptcy 

So your loved one left you

So you got a bad report from the doctor

So your child disrespected you

So that person you prayed for died anyway

So your life doesn’t look the way you planned it…..

What are you going to do inspite of?? Grieve for a while but NOT indefinitely!!!How long will you remain unproductively stuck???

  

We must Live and not die! (Psalm 118:17) While we still have a chance, another heart beat, another breath, can still walk, can still talk, can still think….. Get Up, shift and make today the beginning of the rest of your life. Just in case you forgot, The Bible declares We Win!!

  

#Destiny #wewin #Jesus

Inspiration, motivational, reflection, Self Empowerment, self-help, Spiritual Awareness

Hey Boss, I Quit!!

Less than a year ago I was offered what I thought was an opportunity of a life time! A job earning more money than I had ever imagined, the distance was 10 minutes away from my home, and I could even telecommute periodically. It was a promotional opportunity and when I applied I did not think I completely qualified. I took a step out on what I thought was faith. Six interviews with 13 people later I, yes I, was selected as the final candidate!

 

I couldn’t believe it and praised God for the increase! I was really nervous about starting and hoped that I had the ability as a professional to excel in my new role. I had experienced much success in countless others, this one just seemed to make sense as the next career stepping stone on my way to the top.

 

Approximately 7 months later I found myself resigning from the job I thought was going to put my career on the map and I was absolutely devastated! I endured a tremendous set of unusual trials beginning a little more than a month into the position.  Ultimately, I crumbled under the pressure. My health, both physical and mental were being grossly affected. I was disappointed beyond description in myself and thought the enemy had won! Certainly I had failed and now it was over before it truly got started….

 

 

After consulting God about the ordeal, He revealed why I was subjected to such overwhelming insults in my workplace. I learned that I have been incredibly stubborn in my pursuit for success, have been operating in my own self-defined purpose without His consent, and have been grossly neglecting the gifts He has placed in my life. What a tremendous eye opener, harsh reality and a lesson long over due that I had to learn!

 
You see, for years I have been chasing dollars and trading my life in to the highest bidder. This has been because I truly lacked faith in God that He is capable of supplying all my needs which far exceeds monetary provision in a paycheck. Since I have never experienced increase any other way besides earnings from a job, I literally convinced myself that the only way to experience the God of “More Than Enough” (2nd Corinthians 9:8)  was by heavy pursuit of the next big promotion in title, statute and theory. I couldn’t see it any other way but Faith doesn’t operate by what Chanel could SEE! REAL self TALK!

It was clear very early on in my new position that this was not God’s will for my life. But I ignored the signs which were many!!! Initially I chalked up the controversy I was facing as the enemy trying to steal my blessing. I began to pray for my co-workers, leadership and external partners thinking that was the key to turning the fast sinking ship around. My so called spiritual logic was so far from the truth and was my WILL and not the WILL of my Heavenly Father.

 

 

I began seeing my husband, children and friends as thorns in my life because they wanted me after work and I simply could not produce the best me for them because I was stressed and exhausted! That’s when my health became seriously affected.

 

 (Mommy/Daddy, Stop working and come play with me!)

 

After extended time away from my hostile work environment, God showed me that the thorns in my life were really the job! The roses were those significant relationships I was half giving myself too. Repentance was necessary! No job or amount of money is worth their sacrifice nor mine! Never Again!

 

I finally accepted that it wasn’t me, due to the high turn over not only in the role I was in but in the office overall. (They couldn’t keep staff and leadership failed to look in the mirror!) Acceptance did not come easy but it did at a cost!

 

 

Are you holding on to a job that is robbing you from God’s best?  Are you struggling in your level of faith to believe that if you let go of this thing that you think you need that you will suffer lack?

 

This is not for everyone and I am certainly not suggesting or promoting a campaign for people to walk out on their jobs!  All things in due season and with wisdom.  This is the first time I ever walked away from a job without a concrete back up plan.  But I knew without question that I was hearing from the Lord!

 

If your stress level is through the roof resulting in change in temperament, sleep, eating habits and you are struggling to be present for the true important matters in your life, I encourage you to seek God and analyze if you are trying to remain in control because you don’t trust that HE will deliver. (Proverbs 3:5)

 

For me, I have suffered zero lack and have actually experienced abundance beyond my imagination since I let go and truly started trusting God with my provision. My confirmation that this entire things was and is HIM! My faith today is through the roof that as long as I keep my confidence in words, deed and action that my Heavenly Father is taking care of me, I shall never want for nothing! (Philippians 4:19) 

  
#quityourjob  #ihatemyjob  #lovelife  #Godourprovider #Jesus #mypurpose

Inspiration, motivational, reflection, Self Empowerment, self-help, Spiritual Awareness

You are Such a Weirdo!

 

 

I’m different and I know it.  In personality, conversation, demeanor, sense of humor and overall character.  Yes everyone is different by their own definition, but many can fit effortlessly in common situations when I simply feel completely out of place often times.  This use to bother me for most of my life but now I embrace it for I have learned to see the benefits of my uniqueness!

 

 

As a youngster and into part of my adulthood, I use to think that my personality was seriously flawed. I was mature beyond my years and for other reasons outside of my control.  I felt I belonged more with an older crowd than those of my same or similar age range.  I was drawn to the fact that it seemed that older people knew more.  I could not decipher if that knowing was more beneficial or damaging initially, but I was attracted to their extended experiences none-the-less.  I was often disinterested in what my peer groups found conversationally entertaining most of the time.  This became extremely prevalent for me during my high school years. I remember as a freshman, I stuck out like a sore thumb.  I was quite, a bit odd, guarded and did not fit in easily with any particular group, especially the girls!  I watched countless cliques that were catty, loud, showboats outwardly, unrestrained and full of drama.  That just wasn’t me!  Those were lonely years for me and I remember at times trying to fit in and being tired of my personality appearing strange to most.  I found opportunities to enter into the “Girl’s Club” and would fake being interested in their priorities.  The façade never lasted long.  When conversations became overwhelmingly mindless to me, I would mentally check out and become self-absorbed in my own thoughts.  The countless exchanges would never hold my interest for very long no matter how hard I tried!  Someone in the group would always notice my shift in group engagement because I would be staring off into space somewhere.  I would instantly be put on the spot by at least one in the crowd. Talk about awkward!

 

Once everyone’s attention was on me I could literally hear that Sesame Street Theme song in my mind (One of these kids is doing his own thing; One of these kids is not like the others; One of these kids just doesn’t belong…)  I would shake loose from my trance but knew that I would no longer be invited into the circle. Purposely avoided for being a weirdo!!  I really thought something was terribly wrong with me. Why did I have to be so different and not like everyone else? This identity crisis caused me to suffer from depression and I became extremely introverted as a youngster and into my early adulthood years. Since most of the matters I thought heavily about were not discussed in my peer groups, I would document my feelings by writing. Journals and diaries were often my friends!!

I ultimately gave up trying to fit in.  The effort took too much of my energy and was way too much work! I finally began the process of identifying the value of my distinctiveness in my 30’s. What a relief that was!  I am who I am, take me or leave me!  By the time the next decade of my life came around, this issue was completely obsolete!  There is something about turning 40!  The “I don’t give a Cat’s Meow” switch kicks in full force! Any other opinion besides the Lord my God and those select few who he has sent to love and accept my little quirky ways, are all I will ever need. THAT’S REAL TALK!

 

Truth is; I am Innovative, Creative, Forward Thinking, Driven, a Risk Taker and Challenger of self to knock down obstacles in my life, mind and environment.  My tenacity sometimes even shocks me!  When my mind is set on a matter, watch out world, here I come! I am simply FABULOUS!

 

 

 

I give all credit to this new attitude because I finally have embraced and understand who I am in the sacrifice of Christ Jesus.

A few of my favorite scriptures that remind me there is not a thing wrong with me are:

I am Fearfully and wonderfully made! Psalm 139:14

I am created in the image of God! – Genesis 1:27

I have been called to live an abundant life! – John 10:10

I seek the praises and approval of God, not others!  2nd Corinthians 10:18

Now that I get it and despite the cards life has dealt me, You can’t tell me nothing!!

 

I read an article that I found quite interesting.  The connection between depression and people that are considered “Weird” is no coincidence. It’s the make-up of their creative brains. They don’t walk, talk, operate, rationalize or see the world as the majority.  Therefore depression may become an issue because the struggle to understand why they are so different can bring on feelings of hopelessness.

 

https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/prescriptions-life/201204/little-weird-prone-depression-blame-your-creative-brain

 

But once we accept who we are as individuals, we can begin to flow continuously in our creative matchlessness. The world is waiting and needs what we have to offer! Not a bad place to be by far, especially if you hook up with like-minded weirdos!

Here is another article that deserves consideration. If you have a gift of writing, then sorry to tell you, but you were born to be weird!

 http://www.lifehack.org/articles/productivity/9-weird-habits-that-famous-writers-formed-write-better.html

 

Do you think you are weird?

If so in what ways?

Have you accepted who you are and tapped into your creative strengths?
If not what are you waiting for? It’s pretty cool to be weird so just get over yourself already!

 

#weirdosrock
Suggested Book Read – 

http://www.amazon.com/WEIRD-Because-Normal-Isnt-Working/dp/031031576X