Month: August 2017

Inspiration

Changing in Christ

A little more than a month ago, a movie hit the big screen that attracted millions of people to the theatre. Prior to its official release it’s arrival was highly anticipated particularly by women. During the film’s first opening weekend it pulled impressive sales at the box office grossing nearly $30 Million Dollars!

The hype, reviews and acclaim were many as social media went wild on just how good the movie was. As I planned a “Girl’s Day” out with a really good friend of mine, naturally we felt it only made sense to see what all the hype was about! Sadly to say, we both walked away from the experience extremely bewildered.

I found the movie to be a bit repulsive, tacky and tasteless. Both my good friend and I were incredibly boggled by our reactions and why we were not just as giddy over the content as most.

Don’t get me wrong, I did laugh a time or two but it got far fetched at some points and I personally was turned off by at least half of the script. Personally, I certainly would not voluntarily watch it again.

Thereafter, several woman in my life asked if I had seen it. When I shared my view points of the film, I was looked upon as snooty, odd, crazy, and/or too deep.

After a slight confrontation over the matter with some other women just this past weekend, I further analyzed my viewpoints. Why did these women, (including some of the men that overheard the conversation) take offense simply over my personal opinion?

I clearly heard the spirit of The Lord whisper the only answer that makes complete sense, “The reason you did not like the movie is because of ME that’s working in YOU!”

Over the past 4 years my spiritual life and maturity has been a priority. I had to make it that way in order to fight to save my life. Along the journey and in this fight, I’m changing. I absolutely haven’t arrived but change is certainly obvious.

Things I use to do, I just don’t want to do anymore.

Places I use to go are no longer an option for me.

People I use to hang out with don’t fit in my circle any longer and we’ve drifted.

Things I use to hear that never bothered me before now grieve my spirit and I’m just not entertained by it anymore!

Evolving in Christ is inevitable when you are a Christian that refuses to compromise your position in Him for the sake of others.

You’ll begin to see things differently, go against the grain and become remote in your perspective. You may also become viewed as hypothetical especially if your changing is fresh in the eyes of those who knew you when….

When we desire to fit in more with people than we want to stand out in Christ, that’s called COMPROMISE! This blocks blessings, growth and potential. I don’t want this to be an option for me. I want ALL God has and deliberately work on fixing those areas in my life that I truly can control including what gets in my spirit through what I watch and what I hear.

We should always be working on our conduct in Christ being distinct. How else will those who don’t know Him get to know Him? We must represent and not become relaxed by having a greater regard for the world than our Savior.

If we as Believers find comfort without conviction with things that the world accepts, finds entertaining and approves of, we may have begun to plateau in our walk. Be separate from them is what God has called us to do!

Again, I am very much still a work in progress in the things of God. I try not to judge the actions of others while staying open to correction when I am out of line in my Christian journey. But I am grateful and recognize the changes that are coming over me that draws me deeper in Him still. This is my stance unapologetically.

In your walk with Christ what’s one big change you’ve noticed that you know you’re not going back to?

Have you endured ridicule over your strides to be more like Your Savior?

How do you handle the conflict with the world and other believers?

Inspiration, mental health

5 Steps to Going From Awkward to Awesome!

There was a lengthy period in my life when I felt like the poster child of being socially awkward! This is more true as a youth and into my young adult years. I simply hated it!!! I had no clue why and it really bothered me especially when I began to discover that in order to experience success in areas such as business and friendships, one must have some basic fundamental people skills.

I spent most of those years in a shell and excessively introverted. Coming out was about the scariest thing I ever had to face! All eyes on me I never wanted even for a few seconds.

In Christ, I discovered that my awkwardness was due to issues I had with trust, self esteem, lack of experience with people outside of my community and fear! Awkwardness for me wasn’t natural but learned behaviors due to adverse life experiences. I allowed what I was exposed to to shape me and it was indeed crippling!

I don’t like being defeated by my fears so I at least had the courage to face them even though I trembled! Today I am much better in social settings although at times I do still feel like the odd one but I’m ok with knowing I am a little different. (Maybe that or hitting the age “who cares what people think” 40!)

Conquering awkwardness starts with getting over you and embracing your uniqueness.

Stop worrying about what the majority thinks of you when the only opinion that matters is the one that created you!

If you are socially odd you may agree with the statement that people don’t know what to think of you!

You find it hard to fit in and want to so desperately at times. It takes much mental effort to remain in a social setting without wanting to run for isolated cover.

Breaking the Cycle:

1. Do a self assessment- are you off because of a mental health issue?

2. Identify a circle you want to be in and show up.

3. Identify one person and mingle.

4. Stay as long as you can without falling apart.

5. Repeat until it feels natural!

People WILL get use to you, and God always sends someone to embrace you. You will miss this blessing if your exit is premature. You may not connect with anyone the first time around but keep showing up! No matter how hard or uncomfortable it feels, challenge yourself to break through this barrier in your life.

If you’ve done your self assessment and don’t have the mental problems I mention above, then you may be fine just the way you are! Switch to doing an assessment of those you are trying to fit in with. Are you REALLY suppose to be with that crowd?

A fact about Social Awkwardness:

According to the National Institute of Mental Health (NIH), nearly 15 million people in the U.S. suffer from some form of social anxiety disorder. That’s a lot of people! The one you are looking at wondering if they think you’re odd could very well be looking back at you with the same question running through their own minds!

You are fearfully and wonderfully made says the Word Of God who does not lie!

Step into your position of being all that God called you to be! Get out there in all you awesomeness and make the sentiment of awkwardness a thing of the past! You can and Must do this!

Soulful Sunday

Soulful Sunday – P.P.P.

This weekend, I had a wonderful opportunity to minister on a panel of three women at an annual empowerment conference. The theme of the event was entitled “Its Time To GIFT Yourself Away!”

As a believer, when that statement is pondered on alone, it’s nothing short of deeply powerful and thought provoking!

I was commissioned to facilitate the panel discussion that had an audience of nearly 150 attendees. It was also being audio recorded. I was simply honored to do this for a ministry that has completely changed my life. I give credit for my maturing experience spiritually to this platform fully equipped with a visionary and leader of great integrity!

As I prepared for the conference, I sought the Lord for instruction on what He would have me and the ladies share with the people. We had to elaborate on how each one of us have been able to step into and operate in “The Gifts” that God put in us.

I’ve been blessed over the past 3 years to identify my natural born gift as a writer. Then God filled my life with mentors who have pulled associated talents out of me that I didn’t know were there! Speaking, internet radio, television and becoming a columnist for a Christian Magazine. Within the next few months I will finally be able to add published author to these accolades. It’s all for the glory of God and nothing I saw coming my way just a few short years ago.

Personally, operating effectively in “The Gifts” was a process I call The PPP – Painful Purposeful Purging. Had I not challenged myself to stay the course through my PPP, I certainly would not be doing what I’m doing today!

I want to share what has been involved in PPP for me as I have experienced it. Prior to discovering my gifts, I was a woman full of low self regard, a sufferer of chronic depression for nearly 30 years, a person easily intimidated by others who I thought were stronger than me and didn’t value my life for I had no clue who I was or aspired to be.

When I became affiliated with The DOE Ministry, I instantly discovered that I was at a spiritual crossroad. The ministry demanded in love that all attendees rise and take their rightful position in the body of Christ.

As I looked around at the other women there, the enemy tried to make me feel that I didn’t belong, that I wasn’t good enough, that I would never be as effective in ministry as the others, and a whole host of other lies.

I would either return to my comfort zone of despaired isolation or stay the course and go through A Painful Purposeful Purging. This meant, in a nutshell facing ME! Looking myself in the mirror and deal with my damage! I had to visit some very difficult areas from my past that I had stuffed and suppressed. It hurt like nothing ever has but I could not fathom another 30 years of what I had already endured! There HAD to be more!

Like a boxer in a ring, I decided to roll up my spiritual sleeves, put on my gloves and fight for my life! My opponent, an invisible enemy was clearly trying to take me out! The battle was with no one else but myself!

Committed to being Uncomfortable

Being an introvert and not feeling comfortable around people due to deep trust issue, I had to fight my flesh that wanted to flee every circumstance and environment that would force me to grow up and address my weaknesses. I forced myself to show up consistently and stay to the end. This was so painful in the beginning for I would leave with tremendous headaches at times but felt pride that I conquered something that has had me in bondage for years. The more I showed up, the less uncomfortable I became.

Cleansing My Soul

As comfort came, I was now able to address finding out who I am in Christ.

I began to control my thoughts and renew my mind.

I had to forgive and stop blaming others for my circumstances.

I stopped looking back at my past failures and successes and began looking forward to a future with possibilities!

Most importantly, I started understanding the Spirit of Adoption to deal with my rooted issues of rejection.

My PPP has taken 4 years and is still being refined. I have scaled away layers upon layers of mental mess that has kept me crippled in the Spirt. What is now exposed are my “Gifts” that I can flow in more freely due to heavy weights being lifted. I won in Christ with a major T.K.O.!

For someone reading this, you MUST go through your own person PPP. It will NOT be easy and does not happen overnight. However if you fight hard and long enough, a life is waiting for you filled with abundance! There are also others who desperately need what God put in you!

While you still have time, life and chances, gear up for the purge and start to Gift Yourself Away.

Until next Time, Happy Sunday

hope, Inspiration, Kish Magazine, motivational

K.I.S.H. Magazine – No Way But Up!

Happy Friday RealBoldTruth Readers!

Pray you all are blessed and ready for a wonderful weekend!

Wanted to stop by and share my latest article on the Dreamer’s Blog located on the K.I.S.H. Magazine website!

It’s entitled “No Way But Up!”

I felt the spirit of the Lord leading me to encourage those who are in the trenches of bringing that dream to pass that God put in them but have hit major road blocks.

It’s tempting to get frustrated, throw in the towel and become resentful of the obstacle!

But God!

It’s ok to address our adverse emotions but in a healthy way for when we hit the ground there is truly No Way But Up!

http://kish-magazine.com/no-way-but-up/

God’s still faithful!

Check out the other inspirational articles in this incredible motivational magazine as well.

You can pre-order you next copy which features Pastors Toure Roberts and Sarah Jakes-Roberts. Don’t miss out, printed copies DO sell out fast!

Pre-order at http://www.kish-magazine.com

Inspiration, motivational, Relationships, Testimony, Wisdom

Racism-The Great Form of Evil

Like a great deal of my fellow Americans, my heart simply aches over the recent events that have taken place in Charlottesville VA. It’s a national disgrace and I’m struggling to see a United front in and for “We The People”. Leadership has also delivered a stance a day or two late leaving me wondering if the good for us all is truly a non-biased priority.

My personal experience and view points regarding the topic of racism runs painfully deep. I was once grossly affected by the matter especially as a youth.

Like yesterday I can clearly recall walking to elementary school with my cousins and needing to run through several blocks to safety or risk getting jagged edged rocks slammed in the back of my head. I eventually mastered dodging the blows but only after being wounded on multiple occasions. This was a daily sprint and no way around the confrontation generated simply because of the color of my skin.

In middle school, a boy spat in my face and called me an ugly nigger. I tried to chase him down in flip flops but never caught up to him. I was left feeling like dirt on the ground as his warm thick saliva oozed over my eye and down my cheek. To this day, I believe spitting on another human beings is one of the worst forms of insult imaginable.

Not long after that another approached me and asked me to perform a disgraceful sexual act on him. I remember feeling so frightened for it took him repeating it several times before I understood what he was asking. He was seriously vulgar and I was just about 9 years old.

Several more instances happened thereafter which I won’t disclose but I remember developing the learned behavior of prejudice by the time I was in high school. All of my insults came from caucasian males and I grew a racist distaste over the very site of them. I put them all in the same category and couldn’t fathom any good at all. As an extended result, I didn’t socialize, befriend or seek to get to know anyone that didn’t look like me. I made the assumption that any race outside of my own automatically hates me and I them.

By the time I was approaching 20, a life changing event occurred that melted away a very deep form of racist hate that had been growing in my heart for years. I had rededicated my life to Christ after hitting some tough places and moved to a neighborhood where most residents did not match my skin complexion. I was overwhelmed by how I was embraced but still had guards up looking for hidden agendas. The acceptance just couldn’t be true as I considered my previous encounters. 

Not long after that I befriended a beautiful Korean girl who had a Jewish boyfriend with the biggest heart I’d ever met. Truly the sweetest in my life up to that point. I genuinely grew to love them both and was blessed for these friendships. 

I made a point thereafter to not classify everyone simply because of the ignorance of a few. God healed my heart of the deepest form of hate and I purposely sought out opportunities to get to know all kinds of people who were also willing to get to know me.

Today my heart is completely open and longs for diversity in my relationships. I no longer find contentment in surrounding myself with only African Americans. In fact I prefer to worship with a congregation with a healthy mix of all kinds of people. My current church fulfills that beyond description and I have sisterly/brotherly like bonds that far exceed color lines. Our bond is spiritual by the DNA we share through the sacrifice of our common father, Jesus Christ.

It’s a beautiful experience and I would have it no other way. Adding God’s revelation to my adolescent ignorance as I matured showed me the true definition of love. Had I remained stuck on my initial experiences I would have missed out on rapport with some wonderful people. That would have been my loss for certain if I had chosen to remain oblivious.

I pray for our country and won’t give up hope that we can put our racial differences aside, bond together as humans and demonstrate respect instead of hate. Globally, those with a racists agenda are truly the minority and can remain as such if the majority commit to condemn their behavior as completely unacceptable! 

This may not come to pass in my life time but at least I’m living proof that with God’s love, even a powerful stance of racial animosity can be healed and conquered in Him. I’m living proof, He’s able.