Category: Spiritual Awareness

Self Empowerment, self-help, Spiritual Awareness

Would You Turn That Mess Off!!

  
Recently I stumbled across the Blog of a woman who is battling chronic depression. The way she so eloquently expressed the mounting issues she faces daily, reflected my own life easily. It all sounded eerie and so familiar of how I once thought regularly. She claims she is defeated, and without options. My heart and soul connected with her instantly. She has my empathy, sympathy and more. I absolutely commend her for writing about it, for I know this is therapeutic in surviving this mental health issue. She’s a brave soul, But she needs to know she has control if she wants it…..
  
For me, Depression is like watching a 24 hour marathon of the old TV series M.A.S.H! Some of you may remember it well. Back in the 70’s and 80’s this once popular television program flooded many American living rooms at least weekly. I apologize in advance if you were a fan. I just didn’t get it or I probably never gave it a chance. I was so young back then and never found any appreciation for the series by far! As soon as I would hear the theme music, I would cringe, get up and turn the channel immediately!  To me the music sounded depressing! The show may have been good but I couldn’t get past that darn theme song!!!! 

  

When I started experiencing depression very early in my life I could relate to my fellow blogger. I listened to what ever channel was playing in my mind all day. It wasn’t what I wanted to hear at all, yet I entertained whatever was playing as if I had no options! I won’t, I can’t, I’ll never, no one loves you, you don’t deserve, your father doesn’t care, your mother isn’t there, you will always be poor, you are socially odd and will never have friends, you’re not smart, you are ugly, you are a failure, Yadda, Yadda, Yadda…..TALK ABOUT DEPRESSION!!! All those thoughts were some real M.A.S.H.
  
The above was the M.A.S.H. in my life for 20+ years!!!!  As a result I’ve purposely put myself in danger and have felt suicidal multiple times throughout my youth, young adult years and part of my adult life. All because my mind was stuck on the wrong station!

  

One day I got up mentally, picked up an old rusty pair of pliers, (for those who understand that knob on old model boob tubes!) and changed the re-running channel playing repetitively in my pretty little head! 

  

Those pliers were the Word of God that spoke the complete opposite of what naturally played the moment I woke up! Glory to God, I have a new program I’m completely addicted too!! Don’t get me wrong, clear reception did not happen overnight. I had to put much pressure on the tool to get the knob to actually turn! That station was stubborn! Sometimes I used both hands until I got the first click! 

  

That old M.A.S.H. re-run would always try to come back on, but by applying much purposed resistance through the Word of God, that Stinkin Station finally went off the air!!!!

  

Do you have some M.A.S.H. In you life that has gripped you from experiencing who you REALLY are as defined by God? (1 John 4:4, Galatians 3:26, 1 Peter 2:9-10, 1 Corinthians 3:16, 1 Thessalonians 5:5, These are just a few! Look them up!) You have the power to shut off those negative voices in your head by getting in your rightful position. (2nd Corinthians 5:21 calls you the righteousness of God!) 

  
  

It takes work daily in order to get more positive reception, but the efforts are worth it! At least you don’t have to get up anymore. The pliers have retired! Now we have remote controls and accessing the Word through social media, the Internet and other forms have made these efforts a lot more plentiful and easily accessible! 

   

Kick the enemy out of the DVR in your mind, re-program your mental TV guide and walk into God’s best for your life! You and your destiny are so well worth it!
 

 

Now for those who I’ve offended, here is my peace offering; that M.A.S.H. theme song! Enjoy, if you can! Geesshhh! 😜

Inspiration, reflection, Spiritual Awareness

Soulful Sunday – Holy Rolling

  

Several years ago I walked away from the Lord for two years. I was severely broken, ashamed, angry and drowning in unforgiveness. I rarely let anyone know what I was going through. I also learned rather quickly that my stepping away adversely affected people other than myself.

During that time I reconnected with a friend who is not a believer. We had so much in common less our level of faith. We met over 5 years prior and although she didn’t share my strong beliefs, I snuck in opportunities to minister to her when ever I could. She even attended a Christian function with me but it just didn’t stick. 

When we started to get reacquainted again, she apparently was taken aback by my new dialect, demeanor and resistance to the Gospel and she was still not Saved. One of the first things she said was “Goodness you were such a Holy Roller When I first met you!” She sounded disgusted and relieved!! I was so offended! Of course I didn’t let her know my feelings and we simply laughed it off.

To me and at the time, being a “Holy Roller” meant someone who lives, breathes, thinks and positions themselves outwardly to others as a believer who can do no wrong! Always walking in the Glory and rarely phased by temptations. Always preaching the gospel and sometimes condemning others. I reflected if I really presented myself that way and felt ashamed because my mistakes and sins were now on public display! I was far from being Holy! 

I had also lost a friend of 10 years who I had led to Christ years prior. This particular friend called me a hypocrite because she was shocked to learn that I was going through a divorce and I never gave her a clue I was having trouble in my marriage. She apparently looked up to me and what she thought was my unmovable faith walk. When I fell, she became devastated and wanted nothing else to do with me. It was extremely painful because I never meant to deceive her or anyone else that way. My intentions were indeed genuine but because she poured out her pain to me and I never shared mine, I gave her a false impression that because I was saved my world was Rosy. I just prayed and encouraged her instead of dumping my mess on top of hers. That to her was the deception. I wasn’t being REAL!

I made a vow never to be a Holy Roller, by that definition again!

As time passed life really began to kick me in the guts! When I didn’t think I could get any further from the cross I did! My spirit became so weak and defeated in trying to maintain my stance of not becoming some goody-too-shoes, Holier-than-thou person that I had no other choices but to die or get back up and walk in Christ again. I ultimately chose the later, repented and began restoring my faith and relationship with my Savior.

This experience did teach me some valuable lessons for sure! I will never walk away again! Once a believer, you really know better and can’t turn off his voice from calling you back to his arms! Second, I will and must be more transparent in my struggles for it is part of my ministry and what God has called me to do differently this time. I must create balance without compromising my own faith or those of others. 
  

I’ve been back for nearly 4 years now and my “Prodigal Daughter” days are certainly over! I can’t go back to that ugly woman I had become especially after I had already tasted the Goodness of the Lord. (Gosh what was I thinking?? Oh yeah, I wasn’t! I was insane!!!) Holy Rolling by a refined definition is what I will be doing from here on out!
  

  

Have you ever been a Holy Roller by my initial definition?

Did you ever slip up as a Christian in front of people who expected you not to?

How did you handle it and respond?

On this Palm Sunday and approach of Holy Week, let’s “Roll Out” with much gratitude on what Christ did for us! For without His sacrifice,  none of us would ever be. 
 

 

Inspiration, Live, motivational, reflection, Self Empowerment, self-help, Spiritual Awareness, Win

Rear View Mirrors

  

 
I’m a bit annoyed today! PO’ed, disgusted and down right angry. Not at anyone or anything in particular; just the foolishness and stupidity of the spiritual adversary.

  
His tricks and lies have so many bound up that they fail to see that life has so much more to offer. Will you join me and stop wasting so much time entertaining his agenda? He’s doing his job consistently. When will we begin to do ours with that same level of tenacity and more? 

  
I know a mature woman who has endured a great deal of trouble in her youth. For her, these days occurred well over 30 years ago. She’s a believer in the Gospel yet she’s majorly stuck in her past. I don’t talk to her much and frankly I just can’t. Whenever I do she finds a way to bring up her past as if I haven’t heard the story countless times already! She’s wasting her precious later years dwelling on yesterday. She says with her mouth that it’s her testimony but is not using the experience effectively for the good of others. Her actions clearly reflect that she never got over the pain leaving other areas in her life completely unfulfilled. Although I have a level of sympathy for her it does not run deep. She has options but chooses to think the same way, producing the same results while her time is winding down…

  

Does this story sound familiar? Is this someone you know? Is this you? If so, How long will you remain stuck, affected, paralyzed, play the victim, seeking sympathy, operating in jealousy, living in lack, non-prosperous spiritually, physically and mentally?

  

If you are a believer in the gospel of Christ Jesus, His sacrifice, His resurrection and His precious blood, I honestly believe it is an insult to all He has done for us if we CHOOSE to remain defeated! The mentality is indeed a CHOICE! It’s a mindset and no one else can be blamed certainly after a time.

  

He blesses us with a new day, everyday to take steps to walk into our destiny. He won’t affect your free will to remain hopeless but why choose that when he said that He came that we may have life and life more abundantly? (John 10:10)

  

We will always have trouble in this world. (John 16:33) We can’t get away from it! So will you remain ineffective, unproductive, heavy laden, cast down and defeated all the remaining days of your life? That’s exactly what the enemy wants! Stop allowing him to run amuck in your mind! You have the power, authority and dominion to live in abundance! (I’m not speaking of just material things.) Open your mouth, speak those things, get up and fight back! Don’t leave this earth with a gift you never shared, a ministry/business you never birthed, a testimony you never spoke and a destiny you never experienced because you allowed the enemy to win!

You can’t blame anyone else for your current circumstances especially if the offenses occurred 10,20,30 40 or even 50 years ago! 

So you were rejected 

So you were robbed 

So you were molested 

So you got fired 

So you were denied 

So you filed bankruptcy 

So your loved one left you

So you got a bad report from the doctor

So your child disrespected you

So that person you prayed for died anyway

So your life doesn’t look the way you planned it…..

What are you going to do inspite of?? Grieve for a while but NOT indefinitely!!!How long will you remain unproductively stuck???

  

We must Live and not die! (Psalm 118:17) While we still have a chance, another heart beat, another breath, can still walk, can still talk, can still think….. Get Up, shift and make today the beginning of the rest of your life. Just in case you forgot, The Bible declares We Win!!

  

#Destiny #wewin #Jesus

Inspiration, motivational, reflection, Self Empowerment, self-help, Spiritual Awareness

Hey Boss, I Quit!!

Less than a year ago I was offered what I thought was an opportunity of a life time! A job earning more money than I had ever imagined, the distance was 10 minutes away from my home, and I could even telecommute periodically. It was a promotional opportunity and when I applied I did not think I completely qualified. I took a step out on what I thought was faith. Six interviews with 13 people later I, yes I, was selected as the final candidate!

 

I couldn’t believe it and praised God for the increase! I was really nervous about starting and hoped that I had the ability as a professional to excel in my new role. I had experienced much success in countless others, this one just seemed to make sense as the next career stepping stone on my way to the top.

 

Approximately 7 months later I found myself resigning from the job I thought was going to put my career on the map and I was absolutely devastated! I endured a tremendous set of unusual trials beginning a little more than a month into the position.  Ultimately, I crumbled under the pressure. My health, both physical and mental were being grossly affected. I was disappointed beyond description in myself and thought the enemy had won! Certainly I had failed and now it was over before it truly got started….

 

 

After consulting God about the ordeal, He revealed why I was subjected to such overwhelming insults in my workplace. I learned that I have been incredibly stubborn in my pursuit for success, have been operating in my own self-defined purpose without His consent, and have been grossly neglecting the gifts He has placed in my life. What a tremendous eye opener, harsh reality and a lesson long over due that I had to learn!

 
You see, for years I have been chasing dollars and trading my life in to the highest bidder. This has been because I truly lacked faith in God that He is capable of supplying all my needs which far exceeds monetary provision in a paycheck. Since I have never experienced increase any other way besides earnings from a job, I literally convinced myself that the only way to experience the God of “More Than Enough” (2nd Corinthians 9:8)  was by heavy pursuit of the next big promotion in title, statute and theory. I couldn’t see it any other way but Faith doesn’t operate by what Chanel could SEE! REAL self TALK!

It was clear very early on in my new position that this was not God’s will for my life. But I ignored the signs which were many!!! Initially I chalked up the controversy I was facing as the enemy trying to steal my blessing. I began to pray for my co-workers, leadership and external partners thinking that was the key to turning the fast sinking ship around. My so called spiritual logic was so far from the truth and was my WILL and not the WILL of my Heavenly Father.

 

 

I began seeing my husband, children and friends as thorns in my life because they wanted me after work and I simply could not produce the best me for them because I was stressed and exhausted! That’s when my health became seriously affected.

 

 (Mommy/Daddy, Stop working and come play with me!)

 

After extended time away from my hostile work environment, God showed me that the thorns in my life were really the job! The roses were those significant relationships I was half giving myself too. Repentance was necessary! No job or amount of money is worth their sacrifice nor mine! Never Again!

 

I finally accepted that it wasn’t me, due to the high turn over not only in the role I was in but in the office overall. (They couldn’t keep staff and leadership failed to look in the mirror!) Acceptance did not come easy but it did at a cost!

 

 

Are you holding on to a job that is robbing you from God’s best?  Are you struggling in your level of faith to believe that if you let go of this thing that you think you need that you will suffer lack?

 

This is not for everyone and I am certainly not suggesting or promoting a campaign for people to walk out on their jobs!  All things in due season and with wisdom.  This is the first time I ever walked away from a job without a concrete back up plan.  But I knew without question that I was hearing from the Lord!

 

If your stress level is through the roof resulting in change in temperament, sleep, eating habits and you are struggling to be present for the true important matters in your life, I encourage you to seek God and analyze if you are trying to remain in control because you don’t trust that HE will deliver. (Proverbs 3:5)

 

For me, I have suffered zero lack and have actually experienced abundance beyond my imagination since I let go and truly started trusting God with my provision. My confirmation that this entire things was and is HIM! My faith today is through the roof that as long as I keep my confidence in words, deed and action that my Heavenly Father is taking care of me, I shall never want for nothing! (Philippians 4:19) 

  
#quityourjob  #ihatemyjob  #lovelife  #Godourprovider #Jesus #mypurpose

Inspiration, motivational, reflection, Spiritual Awareness

Soulful Sunday – 2/21/2016

  
The Lord Our God is REAL!

I had someone recently respond to one of my blog post who said they don’t believe in God. The remark didn’t surprise me because Non-Believers are alive and well in our country. It’s their constitutional right as an American and human being to believe however they choose. No judgement here but rather a sincere level of empathy! (Unfortunate how much they are missing out on😕)

Regardless of our beliefs there is no arguing that life is difficult at times. For a unique selection of people, that remark is a gross understatement! While we all will face a major challenge at some point in our lives, there are a core group that will go through unimaginable, insurmountable, breathtaking circumstances and then survive them all! It’s not by their own choices, will or might….

In this level of pain is where I absolutely believe God resides! For there is no other explanation of how a person made it out. Doctors can’t explain, lawyers don’t know how the case was won, philosophers can’t produce a theory, family and friends gave up; BUT GOD! The survival was not by human efforts but something far beyond that surface or deepest level of intellect. It’s Super Natural deliverance by the Great I AM! Any other credit-taking is just plain old arrogance! 

I survived a “Job Like” experience several years ago and I was completely manic throughout it all! Oh how I wish I could say I worshipped the entire time and never sinned against God, but unlike the honorable character Job in the Bible, I failed my tests miserably!!!! the trial lasted 3 years and I despised what I was going through. It was agonizing at every turn. 

I walked away from God because I was angry about my circumstances and came close to believing that he cared or was even real.

Inspite of my rebellion I began experiencing blessings and miracles that I could not explain. I ultimately humbled myself with acts of repentance and returned to his arms. Separating myself from His shelter caused me more harm in the long run. I am truly thankful that just because I left him that He never left me! 

I can not fathom for the life of me why some refuse to know that He simply is!
Even with repeat signs, wonders, testimonies and reference, many hearts remain hard to his existence.

How do you deal or respond to people who say they don’t believe in God?

What approach in ministering to this group of people do you think is effective?

For now I just pray for them that one day their eyes will be opened to see and experience him in all his Glory. Oh come taste and see that the Lord is oh so good!

Happy Sunday😇

Inspiration, reflection, Spiritual Awareness

Soulful Sunday – 1/31/2016

 
The Voice of God

Ssshhhh; did you hear that? Did somebody say something?  God – was that you?

Have you ever Heard him audibly? I mean with your ears like you would with any other person? Well in my 43 years I’ve never.

Some people appear to be more prone to hearing the voice of God, while others like me simply are left scratching their heads!

Have you ever heard someone say well I was talking to the Lord the other day and I said Lord…..And he said…. Like there was some instant exchange in conversation! REALLY??

I can’t question the way some hear from the Father but I also can’t get wrapped up into thinking I have not hit some spiritual epiphany due to lack of maturity.

Never-the-less He does speak to me. It’s just not by a whisper in my ears….
Learning the process of being sure if what I’m being told or instructed has taken quite a bit of time, patience and practice! There have been times during my walk that I felt so sure he was speaking to me and I couldn’t have been more wrong!  Some of those moments left me severely discouraged, disappointed and wondering if I have what it takes to hear his voice.
How can you be sure?
I have learned over a course of time to listen for his direction with my spirit and not the flesh of my ears.
I ask myself a series of questions to serve as confirmation that the instruction or leading is indeed from him:
1. Does the instruction line up with his word complimenting scripture?
2. Am I being lead out of my comfort zone? (His will vs. my own)

3. Am I being Urged to stop trying to be in control? (Whoa this is a biggie for me!)

4. Will what I am hearing benefit anyone besides myself? (Complete selflessness!)

His voice seems to become clearer to me the more I pray, fast, read his word and consider the good of others. 

Are you hearing from God? If so how are you sure that it’s him and not your own subconscious mind? Please do share! I am still growing in this area!

In the meantime, Happy Listening! 

Inspiration, motivational, reflection, Self Empowerment, self-help, Spiritual Awareness

You are Such a Weirdo!

 

 

I’m different and I know it.  In personality, conversation, demeanor, sense of humor and overall character.  Yes everyone is different by their own definition, but many can fit effortlessly in common situations when I simply feel completely out of place often times.  This use to bother me for most of my life but now I embrace it for I have learned to see the benefits of my uniqueness!

 

 

As a youngster and into part of my adulthood, I use to think that my personality was seriously flawed. I was mature beyond my years and for other reasons outside of my control.  I felt I belonged more with an older crowd than those of my same or similar age range.  I was drawn to the fact that it seemed that older people knew more.  I could not decipher if that knowing was more beneficial or damaging initially, but I was attracted to their extended experiences none-the-less.  I was often disinterested in what my peer groups found conversationally entertaining most of the time.  This became extremely prevalent for me during my high school years. I remember as a freshman, I stuck out like a sore thumb.  I was quite, a bit odd, guarded and did not fit in easily with any particular group, especially the girls!  I watched countless cliques that were catty, loud, showboats outwardly, unrestrained and full of drama.  That just wasn’t me!  Those were lonely years for me and I remember at times trying to fit in and being tired of my personality appearing strange to most.  I found opportunities to enter into the “Girl’s Club” and would fake being interested in their priorities.  The façade never lasted long.  When conversations became overwhelmingly mindless to me, I would mentally check out and become self-absorbed in my own thoughts.  The countless exchanges would never hold my interest for very long no matter how hard I tried!  Someone in the group would always notice my shift in group engagement because I would be staring off into space somewhere.  I would instantly be put on the spot by at least one in the crowd. Talk about awkward!

 

Once everyone’s attention was on me I could literally hear that Sesame Street Theme song in my mind (One of these kids is doing his own thing; One of these kids is not like the others; One of these kids just doesn’t belong…)  I would shake loose from my trance but knew that I would no longer be invited into the circle. Purposely avoided for being a weirdo!!  I really thought something was terribly wrong with me. Why did I have to be so different and not like everyone else? This identity crisis caused me to suffer from depression and I became extremely introverted as a youngster and into my early adulthood years. Since most of the matters I thought heavily about were not discussed in my peer groups, I would document my feelings by writing. Journals and diaries were often my friends!!

I ultimately gave up trying to fit in.  The effort took too much of my energy and was way too much work! I finally began the process of identifying the value of my distinctiveness in my 30’s. What a relief that was!  I am who I am, take me or leave me!  By the time the next decade of my life came around, this issue was completely obsolete!  There is something about turning 40!  The “I don’t give a Cat’s Meow” switch kicks in full force! Any other opinion besides the Lord my God and those select few who he has sent to love and accept my little quirky ways, are all I will ever need. THAT’S REAL TALK!

 

Truth is; I am Innovative, Creative, Forward Thinking, Driven, a Risk Taker and Challenger of self to knock down obstacles in my life, mind and environment.  My tenacity sometimes even shocks me!  When my mind is set on a matter, watch out world, here I come! I am simply FABULOUS!

 

 

 

I give all credit to this new attitude because I finally have embraced and understand who I am in the sacrifice of Christ Jesus.

A few of my favorite scriptures that remind me there is not a thing wrong with me are:

I am Fearfully and wonderfully made! Psalm 139:14

I am created in the image of God! – Genesis 1:27

I have been called to live an abundant life! – John 10:10

I seek the praises and approval of God, not others!  2nd Corinthians 10:18

Now that I get it and despite the cards life has dealt me, You can’t tell me nothing!!

 

I read an article that I found quite interesting.  The connection between depression and people that are considered “Weird” is no coincidence. It’s the make-up of their creative brains. They don’t walk, talk, operate, rationalize or see the world as the majority.  Therefore depression may become an issue because the struggle to understand why they are so different can bring on feelings of hopelessness.

 

https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/prescriptions-life/201204/little-weird-prone-depression-blame-your-creative-brain

 

But once we accept who we are as individuals, we can begin to flow continuously in our creative matchlessness. The world is waiting and needs what we have to offer! Not a bad place to be by far, especially if you hook up with like-minded weirdos!

Here is another article that deserves consideration. If you have a gift of writing, then sorry to tell you, but you were born to be weird!

 http://www.lifehack.org/articles/productivity/9-weird-habits-that-famous-writers-formed-write-better.html

 

Do you think you are weird?

If so in what ways?

Have you accepted who you are and tapped into your creative strengths?
If not what are you waiting for? It’s pretty cool to be weird so just get over yourself already!

 

#weirdosrock
Suggested Book Read – 

http://www.amazon.com/WEIRD-Because-Normal-Isnt-Working/dp/031031576X

Inspiration, reflection, self-help, Spiritual Awareness

Soulful Sunday – 1/2016

  

  
Hi RLRT readers! I got an unction this week to start a Sunday theme! Not sure yet how often I will do it (Weekly, Bi-Weekly, Monthly) but I’m starting now!
I’ll call it “Soulful Sunday”. Not original but it’s what first came to mind! Ha!

Well this first is about the importance of feeding our souls. Each human is made up of a Body, Mind, and Spirit/Soul.

We typically don’t think twice about feeding our natural bodies food and drink daily. It’s a natural reaction and essential to live. A lot of us even overdo this “Feeding” thing in this area! (Both my hands up while SMH!)

It takes a bit more effort to feed our minds continuously. Our intellect requires nourishment by way of education and reading to obtain earthly knowledge. Some are obsessed with this while others get just enough to be aware of basic life necessities. Never-the-less we all do it whether forced by an instructor or pursued on our own for higher education.

Feeding our souls is essential and I believe the most neglected when society is considered as a whole. Our soul is that part of us that feels, loves, yearns, and longs to make sense out of matters that simply do not….

If the Soul is not fed good and wholesome nourishment, this part of us will surly suffer from starvation. The neglect can produce anger, depression, sadness, confusion, offense, and other adverse reactions that will negatively affect our lives and those in it.

If this famine of the soul goes on for too long, it will have nothing else to rely on but the food supply from our own intelligence. Things we can make sense of naturally will dominate our lives; this can be dangerous territory! The soul will function off of this source but not at its optimum potential. It truly needs it’s own unique food supply!

As a believer in the Gospel and sacrifice of Jesus Christ, I feed my soul with his Word. There is no educational book that can provide me with the answers to life that my soul demands. I am an avid reader and have found nothing more satisfying to my spirit than the instructions in the Bible. I am a glutton for what it has to offer and feel whole as a result. 

Do you have a balanced life when it comes to feeding every part of your make up? If you are restless, discontent or stuck in anyway emotionally, it may be because your soul is grossly deprived! Try feeding it with the Word of God on a regular. Take baby bites if you are a beginner and then begin eating until your heart is content! It’s probably the only thing you can overindulge in that won’t have waist line or swollen ego consequences!😇

Until next time – Happy Eating in Mind, Body & Spirit.

Inspiration, motivational, Self Empowerment, self-help, Spiritual Awareness, Uncategorized

So I Dream

I want to be a New York Times best selling author! Yes that’s what I aspire to be. But how, when and do I even dare to invest in this dream? The vision is big, the order tall, the obstacles great and  the competition many….

 

Yes me; little ole me whose odds in the past have been mostly unfavorable is dreaming; long, hard and consistently as of lates. I’m haunted daily by this fantasy that refuses to go away…
This strong desire comes at a time when life looks so uncertain in the natural and I am unable to see or predict next steps. I’ve completely lost control of the process.  Nothing right now makes sense and I’m extremely uncomfortable. THAT’S REAL TALK!

But my dreams are demanding me to embrace the challenge and see myself out of my current circumstances by taking a chance. Speak those things as though they were, is what my Savior taunts me to do. (Isaiah 55:11, 2nd Corinthians 4:18)

 

I see myself completely exposed to the attention, the life, the perks and the acclaim. I like most of what I am seeing but not really comfortable with others that will naturally come with the territory (pesky paparazzi and the gossip columnists. I could do without all of them!). It all seems so real through the lens of my discerning eye.

Journey with me for a moment; if you will..

I see my name in the papers, the critics praise and critique my work. I am the talk of the town!

My “Pen Name” is scripted on the cover of books; hard, soft and electronic copies. They are published in the U.S.A and abroad; in various languages for all to appreciate.

I am preparing for awards and writing acceptance speeches; and yes, I’m nervous but I can and must do this!

People are throwing honorary gatherings in my name! The parties are simply fabulous and I must get ready!

I’m draped in breath taking gowns meant for a Movie Star. Vera Wang wants me to model her latest design. So does Versace. I’m confused on which to choose. I certainly won’t be going with CHANEL right now for that would  be way too predictable of course! What’s a girl to do? (sigh!)

I’m Living in a “castle like” abode and hire a wonderful chef to prepare my meals.  Lots of veggies and salad please! 

I’m giving back to the very few who cheered me along the way; when I was no one and my voice was silent. I would not be here without them and my gratitude is endless!

 

Yes, I’m Dreaming like I hit the lottery today but the reward comes from the work of my own hands and not by luck of the draw.
My dreams contradict my reality and common experience. For I’m from poverty, neglect, and routinely overlooked in most places I venture.
But recently I read the backgrounds of two authors whom I admire greatly. They both made it to my dream status and they sound like me! In Fact, they were me, long ago until they started to act out on their dreams….

I shall keep hoping, wishing and yearning. My sacrificial work that must be done in conjunction is my act of faith for I too deserve. Yeah, that’s right; with my head held up high I boldly profess, “Why Not Me!”

What about you? What are you longing for? Share and come dream with me!

#Dream #Ibelieveinme  #Dreambig  #Nevergiveup 

Inspiration, motivational, reflection, Relationships, Self Empowerment, self-help, Spiritual Awareness

WHERE YOU THINK YOU GOING??

Jesus Take the Wheel

This experience is amazing! The feeling is incredible, it’s peaceful serenity beyond my imagination and a calming I have never known. I don’t want it to ever escape me. So I am holding on with a grasp so strong that I can almost feel the warm sensation of bleeding trickling down my soul. It’s cutting, but I welcome the agony for it really hurts so good.

 

Yet I’m way too vulnerable for complete comfort. I feel naked and exposed; emotionally and spiritually. I’m use to calling my own shots, making my own way and producing my own results. Surrendering my will is the hardest thing I have ever had to do! That’s REAL TALK! Yet at this precise moment in my life, I have no other choice. My health, my sanity, my destiny are all at risk if I keep trying to create my own path which has been leading me absolutely nowhere! That’s the agony and bleeding of it all.

 

 

hamsterwheel

I have talked a good talk and presented myself outwardly as if I’m truly believing. But I confess that I have been a counterfeit. Far from authentic in what I know to be true! My pride has gotten the very best of me and I’m left weak and out of options.

I’m talking about a REAL faith walk. REALLY trusting God with my now and my future. I’ve been delaying my own destiny with my stubbornness and trying to go in the opposite direction of his will for my life. I haven’t trusted that he REALLY is going to do what he said he will.

 

 

Faith Walk

Father God I’m sorry, for my ego has been my drive. I’ve been an Indian giver and playing tug of war with you for too long. I’m letting go and finally surrender my wheel to you….

 

 

Are you trying to make your own way out of fear, being comfortable in routine, lack of patience and not trusting God enough? Having more faith in our own strength than his promises is a sure method to a dead end.

 

 

 

im me i trust

Think about it as I have as you journey through 2016 and make some adjustments. Is it time for you to give up that stressful job that is clearly taking a toll on your health but you fear lacking provision? Is it time to stop procrastinating and start that business but you fear not having resources? Is it time to stop demanding your own way in your relationships because you just have to always be right? Is it time for you to go to the alter and solidify your union according to God’s plan for man and wife but you are fearful because your last ended with divorce? What ever it is that you are trying to keep control of, ask yourself an honest question; is it really working for you?

His best for your life is directly connected to you simply letting go and TRULY letting God….

 

Let Go