Relationships

3 Reasons to Date Your Husband

Ladies, take your man out on a date!

Now before you go frowning up at the suggestion, PLEASE note that these recommendations are for Wives only. Not girlfriends, live in chicks, fiancés or any other status not yet bound by legal matrimony!

I would never recommend a woman doing what a man should rightfully be doing for you! He should understand your value, worth and consider working on making you his “Good Thing”! (Proverbs 18:22) The courting process should never be an option!

Ok, now that I got that out the way, back to the Wives….
Before you comment to my blog with that “What you talkin bout Willis” tone, let me explain…..

 

My husband and I have been together for nearly a decade.  I can count on one hand how many “Just Because” dates we went out on that were actually initiated by him over the course of that time.  Suddenly I’m majorly frustrated.  Dropping hints about who is coming to town in concert was not working.  Suggestions in “By the way” conversations about a play I would like to see would go over the top.  Sending text messages and e-mails during work hours of event mailing lists I subscribed to were hitting a brick wall as well.  I concluded that he just wasn’t getting it and probably never will!

 

Last year after communicating my displeasure to him in a not so nice way I must add, I learned that he had frustrations of his own in this same area that I simply never considered. He kept it to himself and my approach pulled it out of him.  The way it happened was not my intentions by far but I am glad it happened.  I was left needing to repent fast! (Wives our mouths can get us in trouble big time!) THAT’S REAL TALK!

After that “minor meltdown” I took matters into my own hands.  I just started dating him and we are having a complete blast!

Wives Consider this if you are facing these same frustrations with your husband:

 

 

1. Relieve you unrealistic expectations that he should be Casanova all the time.

 Men don’t think like us and can easily fall into routine and get tunnel vision. They may take care of Birthdays, Anniversaries, Mother’s Day, Valentine’s Day, and Christmas but many stop there and feel their duties are fulfilled.  You may have to pick up the pieces in order to keep your relationship fun and fresh!

 

2. Get what you want, when you want, every time!

Don’t you hate it when someone does something for you that you really don’t like.  Having to grin and bear it so that you won’t hurt their feelings and down play their efforts can be painful.  If you take charge of the date nights you get to choose and get what you want!  Movies, concerts, plays, bowling, museums, couples night, stay in or go out.  Its all up to you!

3. The Sky’s the limits – you set the frequency and have control! Weekly, monthly, quarterly, etc.

I have been dating my husband now on a regular for the past 6 months.  I try to implement a mandatory date night at least monthly.  I tell him what we are doing, where we are going, who we will be with; date and time.  He entertains me by going along with the plans and finds himself pleasantly surprised by how much fun we have together! It really has been awesome!  By the way,  I think I secretly get a serious thrill out of the control aspect of this thing and telling him what to do!  It’s about the only time I can get him into the “Yes Dear” mode!  LOL! (Sorry Honey!) HAPPY WIFE/HAPPY LIFE!

 

These times are just about us!  It’s an investment in the health of our marriage and reminder that fun does not end at the alter.  We are creating memories and breaking up the mundane routine of life by making fun a requirement! It does a world of good to forget about problems, bills, the kids, work and any other pressures for a few hours and reconnect as a couple on a regular basis.

 

 

So wives, if I have not convinced you already, consider this; the Bible says that we are ONE with our husbands (Matthew 19:6; Mark 10:8). Since that is the case, does it really matter who coordinates Date Night?  We should be treating each other the way we would want to be treated.  I think this is a no-brainer situation, at least it was for me.  What do you REALLY have to lose? Who knows, he may enjoy you dating him so much that he will himself learn the process. If he doesn’t, don’t get upset just enjoy what you have especially if you know you’re not trading him in anyway!

Now cross this topic off the “we need counseling” list and concentrate on the other 199 we need to work on in our marriages! Make this one less thing!


  

58 thoughts on “3 Reasons to Date Your Husband”

  4. What a beautiful couple you are! I totally agree with dating our husbands! We make it a point to go out with each other as much as we possibly can. I have even gotten a babysitter from care.com. We are currently celebrating our 13 year anniversary.
    Blessings to you and your husband😊.

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    1. Awww so awesome!!!! You should write about the dry spell then victory in the experience! I would love to hear you perspective after such longevity in marriage! That would be cool!😊

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    1. You got me literally Lol!!! It is funny now that I think about it but was NOT laughing when I was going through my treat me like a queen phase every month! Lol! Yes keep this nugget in your FRONT pocket when you do get married just in case you get a birthdays and holidays guy like a lot of us gals! Not a bad thing if you can get over yourself! I had to quick! Thanks for the follow! I so appreciate it😀

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      1. It is not a question of liking it, my Dear, but rather one of Time. I fear that I do not have time to do Justice to my many Friends over the Blogging World. …I do hope to read Yours. Love and Regards. 🙂

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  11. I think date night is a GREAT idea and it does not matter what you do just as long as you do something TOGETHER. My husband and I used to do this on a regular once a month but we got away from it. We used to alternate as to what we wanted to do. One date he would decide and the next I would decide. That was alright. We need to start doing that again.

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  14. My wife and I have only been married for a little over 3 years and I guess I am shocked by how other people do or rather don’t do things in their relationships. We married late in our lives (30 and 31) (… it just took me a very long time to find her… and I guess that made us understand what we wanted. I didn’t get married to someone so they could relax at home while I worked. (Not that that is a bad thing, she has supported me while I was in college and I supported her before she got a job… my point is that I wanted a partner and not a arrangement.) I looked for her and married a friend, companion, lover, and person who I wanted to share all the adventures of my life with.
    What do other people do? Just look for someone to have sex with? While that may be fun it is like eating sugar all the time when you can have steak, wine, pasta, and everything wonderful that is filling and meaty. I have traveled all over the world and I found that being alone and having no one to share it with was very empty. Now, my wife and I take trips together and I have my best friend to share it with. We go on dates, some fancy and some plain, but I always find it fun to sit with her and enjoy her company.

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    1. Hi Timeinmyhand! Thanks for tuning in to the conversation. Congrats on establishing a beautiful relationship with your wife and most importantly finding you GOOD THING! You two are certainly on the right track. Just stay there! Over time and unintentionally people begin to take each other for granted and keeping the fun in marriage begins to take work and not come as naturally as in the beginning. Situations begin to change may it be children, a sickness a job loss, death of a loved one or many other things that just come with life. Not forgetting about one another in the process of tough times is essential because they are and do come for all of us! I truly believe that when each individual allows routine to take over then that’s when chaos is more prone to entering into the relationship. Marriage never has to dull out if fun is made a mandatory. Keep that adoration high for your wife and best friend. I am so looking forward to the needle on the divorce statistics to begin to change in the right direction, one marriage at a time. Stay Blessed!

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  17. I enjoyed your article. My husband used to tell my daughter when she asked why she couldn’t go with us, that she was going to leave us some day and that I was going to stay. She’s getting married at the end of the month. 🙂
    I’ve gone to a hockey game with him once for our date and it was not my idea of fun, but I try to do what he likes sometimes so I get an idea of what he likes. We are way different, but we love Jesus and we’ve been married for forty years now. We have enough in common to find places to go and things to do.
    Keep blogging, if you don’t mind me saying so. The world needs to hear what you have to say, in my humble opinion.

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    1. Hi Constance! I am always so thrilled to link with people who are REALLY enjoying success in their marriages! 42 years is to be commended! Congrats on your longevity (adding you to my SHEro list for this!) 😊 Wishing the same for your daughter as well. Your awesome words of encouragement mean so much. I sincerely thank you for that and the follow. I shall keep blogging for sure! Stay blessed. Chanel

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  19. Yes I been doing this for years in our 25 year marriage and I find that not only does my husband enjoy our times out…..he begin even initiating dates as well. Does make for a healthy, happy and fun filled marriage. Thank you realliferealtalk for keeping it REAL!

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  20. I agree and have been doing the same monthly. We are such a stronger couple as a result and the kids (boys) clearly see how we love and foster our healthy marriage.

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      1. We are big kids, really. There’s a lot of shared jokes and goofing around together. We tend to go out as a couple with other people as well. Sometimes we go out on our own as well, just for a change.

        It’s working for us. We’ve been married sixteen years.

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  24. I really do enjoy date nights with you honey, and It has made for more memories in our marriage. I look forward to these times when it’s just us!!

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  25. This is TOTALLY awesome!
    Not to take anything from the men, but they CLEARLY need guidance and how it should be done! Date nights are so essential to a marriage without the game being on, without the phone ringing, without the kids nagging us. Continue with your date nights and make that marriage more happier!

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    1. Hi Kim!!! Thanks my dear for reading! Means a lot to me! I think it’s mostly about balance. I give him space for game time, guy time and flowing in his gifts and talents as an individual. Then there’s Date Night! Just makes for a well rounded relationship and we are both so fulfilled as a result😀 Chanel

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